Running Ramblings

Well folks, I have some news.  Nope, not pregnant.  The 3-4 people in the world who actually read this blog are about to be privy to some inside information.  Ok, don't get too excited.  I'm pretty sure this information is only interesting to me, but I will share with you anyway.  In two weeks, I will be running a half-marathon.  This is big for me.  I've always considered myself to be athletic, but never a runner.  In fact, I've pretty much always viewed running as punishment.  When I played softball in college, we had to run a mile for every minute we were late to practice.  I'm not the most punctual person in the world, but I made sure to never be late - even to the 6 a.m. practices.  So, a couple of months after we got married, I got a crazy idea to try to start training for a half marathon.  Well, I couldn't even get up to a mile as I was dealing with a bum hip (yes, kind of like an 80 year old woman).  So, Chad decided he would do it.  And so he ran the Cleveland half marathon in 2007.  Back in January I started running to train for a 5k in April.  And I kept running.  And one day while running, the thought came to me...why not go for the half now?  Thus began the training.  Now I've asked myself many times, "Why do I want to do this?".  What is my motivation?  For a good portion of my training, I didn't really have an answer to this.  I don't particularly enjoy running.  And as I train, I constantly have self-doubt in the back of my mind wondering, "can I actually do this?".  Now, there's the obvious reason any woman does any kind of activity...get fit, lose a little baby jiggle.  But you don't have to run a half marathon to do that.  So here's the answer: One day during a long run, I was supposed to go 8 miles.  Around mile 6, my body just shut down.  I absolutely could not take one more step, even though the previous weekend, I was able to do 7 miles without such serious struggle.  As I stretched, I thought in frustration, "What is wrong with me? Why can't I do this?!".  And immediately that quiet, calm voice answered me "Because you are trying to do this on your own strength. You need to learn to trust and depend on My strength."  It still gives me chills.  My God wanted me to do this race so I would have to practice trusting Him.  So, although it might sound strange, I now view this as an act of worship.  I talk to God while I run, I listen to worship music while I run, and most importantly, before I start running at all I ask God to help me be able to do it.  I thought that was lesson enough, but then I learned that the race I had registered for (an all women race in another town) had been cancelled!  Now, there is another race right here in my home town the weekened after that one had been scheduled for, but I hadn't wanted to do that race.  God decided to work on my pride as well.  You see, this isn't that big of town.  I didn't want to do my local race, because I didn't want people I know to see me do it.  What if I fail?  What if they note how SLOW I am?  Well, I had to get over my pride and just do it! So there you have it.  And I might add, it's a good thing that there is a bigger meaning and purpose for all this running, because despite my best efforts, I haven't lost a single pound!  If that was my only motivation (as it was at the beginning of my training), I would be pretty discouraged right now.  Good thing I know that "The Lord does not look at the things a man looks at.  Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." - 1 Samuel 16:7  My personal goal from this is to finish the race, with God's help.  I don't care about time, or if I have to stop and walk some.  Finishing is my reward.  Stay tuned...

 

"You must do the thing you think you cannot do." - Eleanor Roosevelt

 

"I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." - Philippians 4:13